Friday, May 21, 2010

In search of ‘Unknown’ self

I am not overtly religious about any particular religion that has evolved. I dont accept totally the faith and truths that religion reveals or is supposed to reveal. I am aware of the mysteries of the universe that is beyond my comprehension but that doesn’t make me worship or become a follower of that mystery. I defy forms of worship of mythological characters and icons or those men who are considered to have got the revelation or be it a formless, nameless or anything else under that category. I do not believe that it is important to worship in the name of religion and worship. However i know that there are the mysteries of the Universe that i do not understand at all although i do have awareness. I am neither an atheist nor a theist. I prefer to coexist with the greater mystery without gratifying it. I am part of the mystery and so is every one. At times, I am a mystery to myself. I call it my unknown self, one of the mysteries of the greater mystery that I simply don’t comprehend. . I realized I need to understand myself before trying to understand the greater mystery. That thought urges me to pursue the search of something about me. A search - a soul searching journey. I know I have to start the search in me but am lost as to where to start and how and been struggling with it since many years. This urge has made me undertake few journeys which I call as self soul searching journeys without getting associated with any of the known religious beliefs. Detachment from the regular way of life during these journeys to places where people go on pilgrimage helps in cleansing me of regular materialist thoughts beyond the known me to get a glimpse of the unknown me. Those glimpses make me feel I am getting closer to the revelation which many mystics attained with ease. I believe every mystic commenced his or her search
from self-knowledge before comprehending the spiritual truths that are beyond the understanding of common men.

One such journey that has helped me glimpse my unknown self has just ended-a trek to Vaishnov Devi mountain  in Jammu & Kashmir, the sensitive state of India. I was there last when I was a babe in arms of 2 year old and now I finally managed to make a journey after 30 years to trek the moutain  I was named after as  a part of a journey ,in search of unknown self.

1 comment:

Laxmi said...

Vaish, its a confused state of mind that you expressing here and I enjoyed reading it as much.What others believe is not important to us as we cannot anyways control what they feel.Comprehensively I find a mysterious travel time you had in India.Self search is a long search.I think only your near ones can help you in the process.Millions of mind make a mess.
Carry on through a great JOURNEY called LIFE !
Cheers !!!